Tagged...

I was tagged about a week ago, and I was bad and ignored it for a while so here we go...

6 words that define my life:

1. Hectic
2. Fun
3. Full of Travel
4. Spontaneous
5. Musical
6. Full of Laughter

Rules state that I now tag 5 others and leave them comments notifying of them of this tag. But, I only have 2 that have yet to be tagged, so here we go

1. My Mom
2. Mindy





And just for the fun of it here is why my life can be hectic sometimes...These are my children:

My kitten, Moxie

She's a killer attack cat.

My puppy Patches....if you look at his tail, he's being attacked.

My babies.

Tooting of a horn.

Pardon me as I toot my own horn for a moment...

In the short 4 months that I have worked at this restaurant, I have received an award for having a sense of urgency and maintaining a quick pace throughout my entire shift. They gave me a nifty little pin to put on my collar.

A day of laughter.

Today while I was at work for my first shift (my second will be here in about 2 hours :(. ) I was about to go get the door since the hostess was busy, until I noticed SDOAG and his family. Now, you may remember SDOAG from my previous blog. I couldn't help but laugh seeming as I had just posted a blog about them yesterday.


...The best part?

The manager that made the servers draw straws for that table the other day, was serving today, and they sat in his section. He deserved it.

A whole new reason for drawing straws.

If you scroll down quite a bit you'll notice I have a blog with a bunch of ideas for what I'm going to be writing about. Well, this is one of those blogs...

There is this table, this horrible horrible table, that comes in when it is, a big factory around here's, payday. I've figured this out because they come in about every other Friday or Saturday, and my boyfriends sister has a desk job at said factory so I confirmed with her, that it is in fact payday. Well, enough about when these people get paid... That's not what I'm ranting about. What I am ranting about is how when you're their server, NOTHING you do is correct, and nothing you do will ever be correct with this family. ...yes, it's one of those.

Honestly I believe that these people were/are into some sort of hard drug, because if you look at their kid, she has a speech impediment, and her eyes are all sorts of crooked and funny. But that could have just been bad luck. Another reason that leads me to believe they're on something, is the fact that neither of them have teeth and the wife is terrifyingly skinny. Their faces are tarnished beyond their years, and the wife always has HUGE bags under her eyes.

Enough of setting up a picture of these people. I'll talk about my first experience with them.

I had only been working at the restaurant for about a month, so I was fairly new, but still had a pretty good grasp on what I was doing. I had a table that had just came in so I went over to greet them. I took their drink order as per usual, but when I did this... Even before I went to make the drinks, they were already made wrong. How is this possible you ask? Well here we go, a conversation just for you...

Me: Hi guys! Welcome to (insert name of establishment here), how are you guys doing tonight?
Stupid drugged out annoying guy (Here on known as SDOAG lol): We're fine.
Me: Thats great! :) Can I start you off with something to drink? Maybe a lemonaid or a Pepsi product?
SDOAG: I want a Diet Roy Rogers. She'll (pointing to wife) have one of them strawberry lemonaides, but it has to be the kind with the seeds in it, and it's never strong enough so we'll send it back if there isn't enough strawberry in it.
Me: Um, alright. I'll make sure to get that done right for you. And for you hun? (talking to their daughter.)
Stupid daughter raised by stupid parents (Here on known as SDRBSP): I'll have chocolate milk, and and and for dessert I want a hot fudge sundae, and and I want a strawberry coco smothie with no pineapple or coconut (BTW, that leaves you with Strawberry Bannana.). And I want the BIGGEST strawberry on the side, not the little one.
Me: Alright, I'll get this right out for you and then be back for your food order.
....I go into the back slightly horrified, not wanting to go back out there, because I don't want to deal with that table anymore, but I'm determined to give her a strawberry lemonaid that she likes, because they think I can't do anything right.

So, I go back out there, I'm going to spare you more of the conversation in fear that your IQ may drop. But I will tell you what else happens.

I bring out the drink order, and everything is done correctly, so they have nothing to complain about, so I ask if they've decieded what they'd like to order? And they all agree that they know what they'd like. So, the man, of course, does all of the ordering for the two women that are unable to speak for themselves, especially in *gasp* public. So, they order, and they're ordering off the Weight Watchers (Now known as WW) menu, which amuses me, but it's fine, anyone can, and a lot of the food on there is really good anyway. But whats even more amusing about it is the way they wanted it prepared. Now, with its being WW and all, it's prepared a specific way, so you can count your calorie intake. Well, they wanted to make sure the broccoli and potatoes that come with their meal were prepared with butter so they taste better. I tried not to laugh at this, since it is WW and all and that kind of takes away the nutritional value.

Anyway, so I take the order, and then bring the food out once it's ready. The wife is in the bathroom, and SDOAG looks at her chicken (that is cooked correctly, he's just a moron), and says "She's not going to want that stuff on it." well, he never told me that, and the manager was standing with in ear shot listening to everything they ordered, because hes had plenty of experience with that family. The manager jumped in right away as soon as he said it and said that thats the way it comes, its a garlic herb sauce that comes on the garlic herb chicken, and the man told us to make her a new one, and that he'd eat her chicken. So to save the establishment from a scene the manager did as asked and got a plain chicken breast made for her.

...I was stiffed on that table, but I expected it from the low life white trash that they are.


The next time they came in, I was lucky enough to have that section so I got stuck with them. But this time I felt that I could better deal, and that I did. I actually ended up getting a tip from them that time, and I felt very accomplished.

A few days ago, the family came in, and the manager called all of the servers to the back to draw straws, and I told them I wasn't drawing straws because I had already had them the last two times they came in, so I was excused from the drawing of the straws.

Q&A Part II

Well, here we go.. I had a couple questions and here are the questions and the answers:

Dear Mad Waitress,
Should you tip your waiter/waitress if the service was bad???? cuz i usually don't.
-Mindy B.


Well Mindy B,

I don't believe that you should tip the server if the service was bad. It's their job to help make you feel more welcomed, to accommodate your reasonable needs, and to make sure that your drinks stay nice and satisfyingly full. But Mindy B. I have a question for you, what do you consider bad service? Bad food? Slow food? Because the server has no control over how the food tastes, or how fast it gets to you.

Sincerely,

Mad Waitress
----------------------------------------
Question #2

Dear Mad Waitress,

I already have a pretty good grasp about what's going on, but how does gratuity work? Does it just get added onto their bill if they don't tip or do you have to waive it if they do tip you?

-Kelly S.


Hi Kelly S.,

Gratuity is generally an OPTIONAL addition to your bill if your number of guests exceeds 8 people (some restaurants vary). Now, gratuity is usually about 18% and that 18% is split between the server, kitchen staff, bar tender (if your table ordered drinks), host, and bussers. Servers are usually given an option if they would like to add gratuity to the bill, and if its a table that they don't think will tip them well, they usually charge it. I, however, have never charged gratuity and there are a few instances I wish I had. For instance, the time I had a table of 12 with a $150 bill, and a $5 tip...When I know for a fact that nothing happened, they were my only table, and none of their drinks were below half full, ever, food came out in a timely manner, and they said everything was great. So, who knows. Thanks for your question!

Sincerely,
Mad Waitress
------------------------------


Well readers, I enjoy addressing your questions like this, it amuses me immensely. I feel like Dear Abby all of the sudden. I hope I addressed your questions with an answer you were looking for :)

Have a good day, I'll post more later.

Q&A...

So I keep telling myself "Self, you should really post a blog" and my self keeps saying "I'm not sure what to write, and I'm not sure what exactly to say to keep people interested"

So, to you my oh so loyal readers, this will be a Q&A:

If you'd like to ask the questions anonymously, go ahead and do so, but I will make a blog about all of the questions that I receive.

Now you may be asking yourself "Self, what kind of questions should I ask." And to that I reply "Well self, anything about my previous blogs, or about being a waitress...anything really"

So ask away!

BoyCheese Sandwiches and a shocking experience.

Today at work I was having a slightly amusing time. There was a party the night before that everyone at work was invited to, but I didn't feel like going because I don't really drink, and I don't feel like I fit in with a lot of the servers 100% yet, so I decided I'll wait until next month when I'm 21 to attend one of these "amazing" parties where everyone has tons of fun. Well, because of this amazing party, everyone was just a wee bit hungover and a couple of people were late. It was amusing, I must say. This also made me seem like a much happier person than normal, just because the other servers didn't feel like moving.

I had a few tables before we started getting our big after church service rush, and even then it wasn't all that bad of a rush.. But, I had this family seated in my section, a daughter probably around 10, and a son somewhere between 6-8. The boy was fidgeting with something on the table, and I was looking to see what it could possibly be when I noticed it looked like a pack of gum with one piece slid out as if you were offering it to someone, then I read the label. I actually found a pack of it online just click HERE. It looks like a normal pack of Wrigley's gum, but I knew something had to be up, and sure enough it says "Shock" on the package. I laughed and told him I knew his trick, and he said I must have a little brother. Needless to say, he was very surprised when I told him just how many brothers and sisters I do have. Anyway..So the time goes by, and I go to their table to take their order and the daughter orders a grilled cheese sandwich, and her brother looks at me and says "I want a boy cheese"and I couldn't help but laugh. Well they eat their food and I come back with the check, and I decide to see if this thing could really shock that hard, besides he'd been begging me to pull the piece of gum the whole time he was there, so I do and HOLY COW! That thing...Wow! I don't even know what to say! My whole arm tickled for a good 10 mins, and the whole table had a good laugh. All in all, I'd say it was worth it because I got a $7 tip on a $21 bill.


Until next time,
Mad Waitress

I need to speak slowly and pro-nun-ceee-ate everything because I think you're incompetent.

As you can probably tell from the title of this blog, it's about a person, a lady actually that decided "I need to speak slowly and pro-nun-ceee-ate everything because I think you're incompetent."... Well, here goes nothing kids. My first night serving by myself I made sure to let everyone know that it was my first night, and they were a lot more patient with me after that, which I seriously appreciated! I would introduce myself, and make sure to get all my cards out there during my introduction, the whole nine yards "Hey guys! My names KaTrina and I'll be taking care of you guys tonight. I'm a little new at this, and this is my first night alone, just so that we're on the same page. *insert little fun giggle...*yadda yadda yadda..." I did this because I wanted to make sure that everyone had the same understanding, that I'll probably mess up!

..Well I end up getting a table with a middle aged couple, and I say my shpeel (sp?), take their drink and appetizer order, come back with their drinks, and give them a few minutes before I come back to take their order. I come back and as I'm taking her order, shes talking SO fast that I couldn't keep up with her! Not only because she was speaking so quickly but also because she was modifying the dish with all of her non-of-this extra-of-thats virtually making chicken into beef, if ya get what I'm saying. So I apologized to her and let her know that because I'm new it might take me a second to write down everything she said, and that I'm going to need her to repeat what she said, and she literally seperates ev-er-y th-ing sh-ee sa-ys ss-oo th-at li-tt-le in-comp-e-tent way-tre-sss cc-aa-nn un-der-sta-nd wh-at sh-ee-s wa-an-t-ing... I'm sure you get my point. And my first day was several months ago and I still remember what she ordered. She wanted a dish (I'm not saying the name because I don't want to give out where I work), and she didn't want the cheese or the pico de gillo, but she wanted extra green peppers, and no onions, and instead of the spanish rice she wanted a baked potato with no sour cream but extra butter, and she wanted a side of cheese for her potato, but she didn't want the cheese just plain shredded, she wanted it melted so she could put it on her potato herself, with a side of barbecue sauce. OMG. Ugh.

Im sory if us encompitet, un-educaded waytresses are to ignoreant for you. We dont knoe anee better, I promise.

...Eww my spell check is going crazy.

Needless to say, I got her order right, and she told me it was the first time it had ever happened at that restaurant, and that she was extremely impressed that a new server was able to get it. I was half way tempted to tell her the reason I got it right was because I was determined to prove, what she probably thought of me, wrong.

Boo-Yeah. (Who says that anymore, I mean really?)

...Well Until next time...

Yours Truly,

Mad Waitress.

Just a quick question...

This has absolutely nothing to do with being a Mad Waitress, and for that I half way sincerely apologize....kinda.

I have like 100+ views, in the two days I've had this... and I was just wondering how many people I have lurking and stalking me. Feel free to tell me in a comment, I won't bite..... I SWEAR!

What?! You won't serve me alcohol because I don't have my I.D. on me?!

I believe just a quick "no" will suffice in this blog. Or at least that's what I thought until I had a specific table...

A table of two was seated in my section, I great them and almost immediately the man at the table was asking for alcohol. Now, if you don't look older than 35, I'm I.D.-ing you. Sorry, deal with it. He said he left it at home, and I apologized and said I couldn't serve him with out seeing it. He was angry, tried explaining himself, told me when his birthday was. I apologized and told him that I could get put in jail and slapped with huge fines if I did serve him and he was underage. They left, he was pissed. Oh well, big deal. Get over it. A note to him for next time: Bring your damn wallet, don't make your girlfriend pay!

I'll take an application with my steak please.

About two weeks or so ago, I had a nice-ish looking couple come in. I took the table, they were all dressed up in their motorcycle gear, I saw their bikes outside, and I'm thinking "Sweet, this table is going to be fun!"...Maybe I should just stop thinking?

Anyway!! The couple orders, its a $40-some-odd bill, I drop it off and when I do, she asks for an application. I go and get one from my manager (Who was irritated about how unprofessional she was being and didn't want me to give her one. I begged him so they would leave lol). So I finally bring one back to her, and apologize for the wait because he had to print it off of the corporate website. She said it was fine, and I took the credit card, ran it, brought back the slips for her husband to sign, and they leave. I drop back by the table to help the host clean it off, I look at the table, look at the credit card slip, NOTHING. Great. No tip. What did I do wrong?! We weren't even busy, so it's not like I ignored them! There glasses never got empty, they said the food was great?! I got her the application. UGH! After I was finished the manager asked me if they tipped, and I said no. He spouted off with something like; figures, she doesn't have enough class to come in and proffessionally ask for an application either. Needless to say, I doubt she'll be getting hired.

...What baffles me is, do people who stiff their server really believe that we won't remember you?! Ha. Whatever.

Happy 4th of July and all that jazz...

Well, while you lovely people are out sprouting off fireworks, I'll be wasting away inside a restaraunt that won't have any business, so we'll just stand around talking. Sounds fun, right? Yeah for you. This means less money for us.

You see, not many people will go out today, a lot of you will be grilling, blowing limbs off, swimming, getting burnt like non other. They have no reason to go out to eat, they'll be too busy getting fried to a crisp! So, in turn, no money for poor little Mad Waitress.

Unlike most of Corporate America, our pay is determined by tips. We do get an hourly wage... 1/2 of minimum wage. HOORAY!...yeah, no. I make a whole $3.33 an hour. They expect tips to make up whats lost. What ever you don't make, they will cover, however, gritting their teeth the whole way.

The statement above is why you shouldn't "stiff" your server. Like my last table of the night did last night. I did NOTHING wrong. They had just been drinking. They were annoying, slobbish, white trash, and that replaced words like "them" and "they", said "ain't" and all those other nasty habits they happen to have, like having belching contests in public. You laugh now, you think I'm exaggerating. Pfft. Whatever. Because I had the last table of the night, I was the last person out of there a whole 45mins. after close. I was about to tell them to "suck it" and get out so I could clean my tables and pick up all the nasty crap they spilt on the floor.

Yes, so Happy freakin' 4th of July America. Enjoy it while you're not cooped up.

Oh, you must have learned that in Waitress School...

My first night closing at this particular restaurant, this lady and her grown daughter, and son in law came in to eat. The couple shared an appetizer, and she ordered a steak, with fries and veggies. She specifically told me she wanted the veggies and fries prepared AFTER the steak, to insure that they would be nice and hot. Now, I know that I would want the same things done for me, because it is nice to have everything fresh. But I can almost guarantee that if you're going to a sit down restaurant, and not McDonald's you shouldn't have to worry about not getting fresh food.

Now, her food is out, and as soon as it is called I run back there and bring it out to her to insure freshness, and that nothing has any time to cool off. (I'm sorry if you burnt your mouth because of this, lady....okay maybe I'm not sorry, but still.) I notice her drink is a little less than half full so I go to the back, and get her another, bring it back to her and she said "Oh how nice, you must have learned to not let a customers glass get less than half full in Waitress School." Now thinking about this, I really wanted to come back with something along the lines of "No, sorry I go to NWMSU, I didn't think they had any courses like that, and if I were taking something like that I'd be far off track with the courses I'm supposed to be taking, since you know I am studying Office Information Systems and Public Relations, not that you'd know what those are anyway."

Some people... "Waitress School"?!?! I mean really. I'll tell you what school you should go to lady!

Oh so therapeutic this blog thing is.

I think I'll save more of these posts for later, I've already posted too much for one day.

So many more ideas...

So, I have so many more ideas for blogs about my encounters as a waitress, so I'm going to make a list of whats to come...


*Oh, you must have learned that in Waitress School.
*The Three, Sometimes Four, Ignorant Stooges.
*Now that I've finished eating, I'd like an application please.
*What?! You won't serve me alcohol because I don't have my I.D. on me?!
*I need to speak slowly and pro-nun-ceee-ate everything because I think you're incompetent.
*Really?! You're a college student?! I thought only unwed mothers were waitresses.


...and many, many more.

Oh yes...

I'd like to thank Kelly's mom for making Blogger so neat-looking, and making me want one too.

I've been converted.

Thats right folks, KaTrina here has joined "Blogger". Now, because I've joined this wonderful community of people blogging does not necissarly mean that you'll be recieving new posts daily, or even monthly.

As a matter of fact, I'd like to thank an evil old mean lady that came into my place of work yesterday, for making me so angry that I needed to vent out to someone, anyone! About how not to treat a server when you are at a restaraunt. Granted, I do understand that some of them deserve it.

Yesterday, Wednesday July 2nd, a little old lady came in to eat. It was not my turn to take a table, but my fellow server decieded she just couldn't be nice to this lady any longer and asked for me to take the table, because she would end up fired. I thought for a moment, and decieded I liked her enough, and didn't want her fired, so I would take the table. Now I walk up to this little old lady, and introduce myself. I asked her if I could get her something to drink, and she immediatly starts moaning and groaning about our prices. And asks how much just a plain hamburger costs, without the french fries. So I tell her, and she whines and complains some more, and I said, "I'm sorry I don't make the rules, I just play by them." and for some reason this made her a little upset. I did not say this is a mean or nasty way, I simply just stated a fact. So, she says, I'll take one anyway. So I ask her again, if I could get her anything to drink, and she said she would like water, with lemon, if it was free. So I gritted my teeth and didn't say any smart comments, and let her know that the lemon, in the water, was free. She seemed happy enough.

Eventually her food comes out, I make sure she needs nothing else, and let her eat her burger. I walked around and checked on her a couple of times, didn't really say anything to her just made sure she was okay and that her food tasted fine.

Then, when I noticed she was about done eating, I brought her her ticket, and told her whenever she was ready, that I would be her cashier. I waited for a while...no money was left on the table. Waited..Waited...Waited..FINALLY! She has the money sitting on the edge of the table, like most folks do when they are ready to pay... so I walk over there, go to pick up the money, and she says "It's not all there" and I replied, "Oh I'm sorry. I'll give you a few more moments." and as I began to walk away, she said "What, are you in some type of hurry? Is your shift over now or something?" and I told her no, that I was just trying to take care of things so that she didn't have to wait around. She snapped back saying "I'm not in any hurry I don't know why you are trying to push me out of here." and I said, oh I'm sorry ma'am I'm not trying to hurry you out. Then she yelled at me for taking her EMPTY plate, because now she has no napkins. So I went and got her a few napkins, and left her alone. She paid, and left me $0.50. I was fuming. I almost went outside and said "Ma'am you forgot your two quarters on the table."... Instead I laughed about how mean and cruel some people can be and took a few breaths.


...Yes, I introduce you to "The Diary Of A Mad Waitress" More fun stories to come.